Hearing impaired or not, that is the question!

It was pointed out to me recently on twitter that | use the word impaired when referring to my hearing loss. I have always used this term, not to offend others, but as a general way to describe hearing loss. It was suggested that I shouldn’t use this term for the offence it can cause others, in response I want to justify why I chose to use the words “hearing impaired” when tweeting about England Deaf Rugby’s search for female players.

The meaning of life

Today, while on the net I found this amazing video of a 6 year old explaining the meaning of life.
I want to reblog it for a number of reasons, I think that the philosophy behind it is amazing, and the little girls voice and sesame street style of the video really make it hit home.

The video starts with an important question, when you are 90 in your rocking chair on your porch what do you want to look back and say you have achieved. It goes on to tell us how we are the only ones stopping ourselves, that we are the ones who should not listen to others and should put in the hard work to become who we want to become and not be too scared to do it.

Simply, this video made me cry because it really hit home with how I have been feeling recently, directionless. It's inspirational and something for everyone to look at and take in. Especially those who feel they have barriers put in front of them. Listen to this and see how many of those barriers you can take down to let you become who you want to be.

Just one of those days.

Every so often, you wake up in a bad or odd mood and thats it. You feel like the entire day is a write off, it's just one of those things. People tell you that you've 'woken up on the wrong side of the bed'.

When I was a child I used to get back into the bed and then get back out of it a different way to see if that solved it. Obviously it didn't. But it was always worth a try.

These days are bad enough for those of us who don't have aspergers, but for my other half they are like hell. We recently had one of these days. She woke up and within a few minuets it was clear to see her usual morning smile wasn't there. We decided to work with it, to go and do something out doors but quiet. We went for a picnic and it was good, there were a few wobbles, a couple of times where panic and tears nearly set in. But after taking a moment, a deep breath and a reassuring squeeze of the hand. We made our way through it.

Because no matter what they say. Tomorrow is another day and sometimes it's just easier to wait until then.

Getting back on the job hunt....

I've written recently about the ugly world of job hunting and how much my other half has struggled with trying to find work. In my last post I talked about the services that were out there to help get those with autism into work. I didn't know how useful my other half would find it.

My last post discussed how I had turned to the  National Autistic Society for help. And since posting I convinced my other half to have a look at Remploy.

What dating someone with Aspergers has taught me.... part 1

A lot of the time I just write about different situations that I have found my other half and I in, and how we have overcome different obstacles infront of us. I write about how I have helped my other half and what I have done for her. But are relationship isn't one sided. This post is a bit different. I want to write a series of posts about the valuable lessons I have learnt about loving someone with Aspergers.

Communication 

I have always thought I can communicate well. I like to chat, to almost everyone, I studied a Creative Writing at university, and I work within an internal communications agency. I may not be confrontational, but I have always written on my CV 'strong communication skills'. What I should have said on my CV is 'good waffler'. It was only when I met my other half that I realised just how much I can waffle on.

Breaking the routine isn't always bad!

Good news, my plan for the weekend worked better than I had hoped. While I was left running around a field in army greens pushing my fitness and my mental strength to the edge, my other half spent her day doing the things she loved without me.

Friday just after I wrote my blog I had a text to thank me for the card, we spoke on the phone briefly and she promised to do the little things on the list I had given her and to keep herself busy.

Saturday, I text to say I had got to the army base and was safe, before being escorted to a VIP tour and the battlefield training session. It was killer but I kept a smile on my face. In Essex, my other half went to one of our favourite places for cake 'Poppins', with a magazine. When she told me about what she had been up to she said it was so much better to go alone. She told me how great it was to just sit and read and not have to worry about talking to people or looking rude. It made me smile, there is me thinking that going somewhere alone would appear odd to others, yet actually she's quite right and I'm sure a piece of cake and a good magazine or two was a great plan. So while she sent me photos of cake and her dogs, I sent her photos of my face after training, my taped up ankle and the England kit I got to wear.

Overall, it was amazing to get back sunday, have her turn up at mine and have dinner with my parents while I recounted as much as I could about the weekend. And I think we both learnt, that breaking the routine, although hard, is bearable, you just need to work with it.